stillrose: (Breaking Free cover)
[personal profile] stillrose

Title:  Breaking Free (35/many?)
Fandom:
BTVS; Spike/Xander
Warnings: Slash, AU, Sci-fi, kink
Rating:  NC-17
Summary: Lt. “Xander” Harris and Captain William the Bloody have both suffered and lost in the on going war between the Biogens and Council. Now, Xander finds himself a prisoner of Captain William the Bloody (aka Spike). What will be Xander’s fate?

Previous parts here.

As always: Feedback make my heart go pitter-patter.

Ok...much thanks to

[personal profile] slashpuppy for betaing this chapter. :)

 

 

Thaks for all the well wishes as well. I am feeling much better. I am conflicted though. Bears or Colts? Grew up two hours outside Chicago and so as a kid it was always "Da Bears". But...I'm a born and bred hoosier and live less then two hours away from Indy. *sigh* Oh well..guess who ever wins on Sunday I should be happy.

[profile] petxnd made me a wonderful (not work safe pic) but I think I'll save it for a different chap.

Stay warm folks!


Without missing a beat, but praying Spike would understand, Xander replied, “I did what I had to to survive. You don’t think I’d willingly submit to that do you?”

Riley arched an eyebrow.

Remember your promise, Xander silently begged Spike without looking at him.

“That,” Xander said as he pointed without looking at Spike, “is beneath me!”

Then before Xander could see the look on Spike’s face he delivered his own kick to it. The force of Xander’s kick sent Spike reeling and falling backwards to the ground unconscious.


Faith wasn’t sure how they cleared the
Wash colony and the Council forces. Faith’s focus had been Wesley and the steady amount of blood pumping out of his abdomen. She remembered stumbling into their makeshift medbay screaming for Fred.

Too soon and too late it seemed Fred ran into the bay, stumbling when The DeSoto was rocked by Council fire. Faith remembered Fred shoving her away from Wesley and screaming at Faith to go help Gunn. Faith hadn’t wanted to leave Wesley. A hard slap had sent Faith reeling and brought her focus to Fred.

“GO HELP GUNN!” Fred had screamed and then turned to begin to work on the too pale Wesley.

Faith didn’t remember getting to the bridge. She didn’t remember taking over piloting the DeSoto while Gunn worked on returning fire. Faith just remembered thinking, Wesley’s eyes are blue, not his lips. Lips aren’t blue.

Faith didn’t know whether it had been days or rotations since their hasty retreat. What she did know was that she was tired. She sat in the galley staring at her bloodstained hands while Gunn poured her a proto-fizz.

“Drink it,” Gunn ordered. “Even Regents can go into shock.”

Faith nodded and took a sip. The bubbles irritated her sore throat. Had she screamed that much or did tears do that to you?

“Fred said she’d be here in a few to give us an update,” Gunn said.

Was that good news or bad news? Faith wondered. Isn’t SOP for bad news to be delivered in person?

“Faith,” Gunn tried again to bring the Regent back to the present, “Wes is strong.”

“There was so much blood,” Faith whispered.

“We can’t lose it now, girl,” Gunn tried again. “Spike…”

“Spike’s gone!” Faith cried finally meeting Gunn’s gaze.

“And Xander’s gonna bring him back!”

“And you believe that?” Faith laughed bitterly.

“Yes,” Gunn said simply, “and so do you.”

There was a faint knock on the galley archway. Gunn and Faith swiveled their attention to Fred who was entering the galley.

“I could use one of those, Charles,” Fred said as she nodded her chin in the direction of Faith’s proto-fizz.

Gunn got up and poured Fred a glass of the fizzy liquid. Fred sat down next to Faith. Gunn sat back down on the other side of the table opposite “his” girls. Gunn slid the asked for drink over to Fred.

“Thank you,” Fred said before she took a drink. She could feel the tension radiating off of Faith. Fred wasn’t trying to be cruel in not immediately updating Faith and Charles on Wesley’s status, but she’d just had her hands inside a man she knew loved her and she needed a moment to compose herself.

A moment, that ain’t too much to ask for, Fred thought, is it?

“Fred?” Faith quietly urged.

Fred sighed. “I have him stabilized…for now.”

Faith and Gunn released a sigh of their own.

“I won’t lie to you,” Fred continued. “It’s not good.”

“How bad?” Gunn asked.

“He was hit from front to back on the left side. I think his left kidney is gone and so is the spleen.  Bone fragments from the shattered eleventh rib appear to have lodged themselves in the thoracic and lumbar regions of the spine…”

Faith choked back a cry.

“The abdominal aorta was hit. I’ve managed to seal it and the other bleeders. I’ve cleaned out the abdominal cavity as much as I dare….”

“Is he gonna make it?” Gunn asked.

“Not if we wait until we reach Hyperion to get him proper medical care,” Fred said.

“You have him stabilized?” Faith asked.

Fred nodded, “It’s taken almost our entire blood and plasma standby, but yeah I think I do. I also have him sedated, but he needs professional care now.”

“What’s the closest friendly colony with that kind of juice?” Gunn asked.

“Inara,” Faith replied.

Fred nodded. “They should have the facilities to treat him there. They might even be able to treat the spine. The sooner they can get the fragments out and start the SC therapy, the sooner he has a chance of being able to walk again.”

“There’s a chance of that?” Gunn asked.

Fred smiled grimly, “Well it’s not Biogen science, but stem cell therapy has been around for some time. If we can get a graft started on his spine soon his chances are good.”

None of the remaining DeSoto crew articulated what they were thinking. On Hyperion they had the ability to ensure Wesley’s full recovery, but if they waited to get him there he might not make it at all.


“We’re going to Inara,” Faith said as she stood up to head for the bridge. “Fred, stay with Wes. Let me know if anything changes. Gunn, find out who we can trust on the colony. I don’t think we can risk sending a message to Angel right now, but we’ll want to get word to him as soon as we can.”

Fred and Gunn nodded. Faith tried to smile and then left for the bridge. She still hadn’t thought to wash the blood from her hands.


***

“My poor, Spike,”  the soft voice drifted into Spike’s consciousness. Spike blinked into the pressing and surrounding darkness.

“Bugger off,” Spike spat as he struggled against the wrist restraints that held him to a hard and cold metal wall.

“They’ve put my Spike in the corner and taken his toys away,”  the voice spoke again.

Spike furrowed his brow; the voice was feminine and familiar.

“Some vid tricks will get you Jack and shite,“ Spike snarled while slipping into game face. “And Jack just took a big crapper before heading out the airlock.”

The voice giggled and a light began to slowly filter in front of Spike slowly revealing the tall and willowy form of a thin pale young woman with dark eyes and darker hair. She reached out a hand to gently trace the hard edge of Spike’s cheek.

“Dru,” Spike whispered in a broken sigh momentarily forgetting his circumstances.

The woman smiled and leaned down close to Spike so her lips hovered above his.

“My poor William, Dru softly breathed across Spike’s lips.

“Yer not real,” Spike said in another broken whisper and let his face resume it's natural form.

“Was I ever?” Dru asked.

“Go away, luv,” Spike said as he turned his face away from his haunted apparition.

“Not before you remember your promise,” Dru said.

“Promise?”  Spike looked back at Dru.

“Ms. Edith said you can’t come to tea,” Dru started to say in a sing song voice as she almost seemed to float away from Spike. “We have no biscuits.”

Spike dropped his head forward. They got the nutters part right, he thought.

“I’m not serving the bad boys either," Dru pouted. “I’ll not dance or pour for them when they hurt my Spike so.”

Spike looked up at Dru. How did she…?

Dru smiled, “You never hid your thoughts from me, not even when they were naughty, naughty thoughts.”

“Dru?”  Spike asked again dreading and yet hoping for her answer.

The woman smiled again and then began to twirl around. The light followed and seemed to only illuminate her.

“My poor Spike all alone in the dark without his toys or his kitten for comfort.”

“Kitten?”

Dru stopped twirling around and then returned to hover over Spike.

“Remember your promise, Spike.”

Dru once again ran her hand gently over Spike’s face. “Remember your promise. Remember your kitten?”

Wot the bloody hell is she talking about? Spike wondered.

“Dru, luv, if there was something I’ve forgotten,” Spike said, “Some memory I forgot to honor or promise made….”

“Spike,”  Dru interrupted in the voice she used to use to correct a naughty child, “I’m your Dark Princess and you have never disappointed me.”

“I don’t understand, luv,” Spike said.

Dru once again backed away and began to twirl in the darkness.

“He’s dark eyed and light hearted,” Dru began to sing song, “He rolls over and purrs sweetly but his claws are sharp!”

Dru curled her fingers and pantomimed clawing at the darkness.

‘Dark eyed’ and his claws are sharp? Spike thought and then he jerked hard against his restraints and focused his gaze on Dru.

“Xander?”

“Oh he’s a sweet kitten!” Dru said as she laughed, twirled and clapped her hands. “He keeps my Spike warm and in smiles.”

“What about Xander?” Spike asked desperately.

Dru stopped spinning and drifted back to Spike.  “Remember your promise,” she said.

My bloody promise? Spike thought. What is she talking about?

Then once again Spike jerked against his restraints as realization surged through him almost painfully.

“I love him, Dru,”  Spike said in a stronger voice then he’d yet used. “That hasn’t changed.”

Dru smiled then and pressed a soft kiss to Spike’s lips. The kiss was sweet and swift. It left something in Spike a little more broken and yet a little more restored.

“Then make sure you keep your promise,”  Dru smiled. “Make sure….”

“My promise?” Spike started to interrupt only to have Dru lay a long silencing finger over his lips.

“Blue for your eyes,” Dru continued, “and kitten brown for him. Silver for shining in the dark and for showing him how precious he is.”

“Dru?”

“Remember, my Spike,” Dru said softly. “Good kittens need collars to remind them that no matter where they stray or how lost they get, they have a home.”

Spike stilled for a moment marveling in Dru’s touch and what she was telling him. For a moment Spike was lost in the letting go and the hanging on; then he smiled.

“I suspect he does,” Spike said.

Dru smiled in return before once again spinning away and clapping her hands.

“He’ll take good care of you, Spike,” Dru said as she danced in circles, “He’ll be sweet, soft and warm. He’ll be yours but like all good kittens he’ll also be his.”

“Wouldn’t want it any other way,” Spike smiled again.

“Make him purr, Spike,” Dru said as she continued to twirl. Then the light which had been illuminating Dru began to flicker and fade.

“Make him purr and he’ll make you smile,” Dru’s fading voice continued to sing song until the light and her form were completely gone.

“I will,” Spike promised.

Pain suddenly flared through Spike’s being and he felt his whole body arch in response.

“Will what, Seventeen?” A harsh voice demanded as another bout of pain raced from Spike’s skull and down his spine. “Be a good Biogen?”

When the next surge of pain coursed through Spike his stomach revolted in protest. Bile erupted from Spike’s mouth and spilled down his chest.

“I guess you forgot how much pain the chip can produce, eh?” the voice asked as hard knuckles rasped against something metallic lodged in a tender and raw spot on the side of Spike’s head.

Spike felt his wrists released and he fell forward face first onto the floor.

“We will just have to remind you, Seventeen,” the voice spat as a swift kick was delivered into Spike’s side.

“Lesson one; we can hurt you all we want,” the voice said as two more swift kicks were pounded into Spike’s lower back.

“But you?” the voice said, “Well that’s lesson number two. You. Can’t. HURT. US!”

This time the succession of kicks punctuating the voice’s last four words were aimed at Spike’s face. 

Why’s it always in the bloody face? Spike briefly wondered before he once again surrendered into unconsciousness.

TBC in prt 36


 

Date: 2007-02-01 01:36 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bmblbee.livejournal.com
Oh no! Poor Spike. You really are rough on the
poor guy. Great chapter. B.

I know...I know...

Date: 2007-02-01 09:35 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] stillrose.livejournal.com
...I'm a bad author...but...I promise..this is a Spander story...

Already started work on chap 36.

sr

Date: 2007-02-01 01:48 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lit-gal.livejournal.com
Oh god, poor Spike. I really hope that Xander's claws come out soon and that some of these soldiers end up dead-dead-dead!

I know...

Date: 2007-02-01 09:39 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] stillrose.livejournal.com
...but Xander's claws are gonna have to be capped a bit (you know the new alternative for declawing..big advocate here of NOT declawing if possible).

However don't worry...Xander is the white knight and a loyal lover...he'll do something.

Already started work on chap 36. It's supposed to be REALLY cold this weekend...(single digits with wind chill below freezing). I think it's perfect weather for my sweetie to make his amazing chili and homemade cornbread while I bundle up in my fuzzy blue thing and write with cats in tow around the 'puter.

:)

sr

Breaking Free Ch 35

Date: 2007-02-01 03:43 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] slashpuppy.livejournal.com
Read the chapter again and really enjoyed it.

And all I could think of when reading it was:
'Make Wesley a Biogen too' *jumps up and down in wishful glee*
and
Please could *somebody* kick seven kinds of crap out of the guys hurting Spike. Please? *pets Spike*
and
Where the heck is Xander? Here kitty kitty ... I *so* love the idea of Dru referring to him as Spike's kitty. I can *see* that visual!! Ummmmm ... Ooops I may have been affected by lit_gal's Toys 8 1/2 story ... tailverse! :-)

Re: Breaking Free Ch 35

Date: 2007-02-01 09:42 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] stillrose.livejournal.com
Hey sweetie...sorry I initially credited "Angstpuppy" for the beta instead of you! Got my "puppies" cornfused >;)

Glad you liked the chappie and thanks for the wonderful and quick job on the beta. I've already got part of 36 down on paper (yeah..I carry a notebook and when I don't have access to the 'puter I do writing my by hand...most of 35 was written while my charcter was out of action during my Tuesday night RL RPG.)

The other part of 36 has been rolling around in my head so I hope to have another chapter too you soon.

Glad you liked the Dru parts...and her referring to him as Spike's kitten. :)

sr

Date: 2007-02-01 04:20 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] amaterashu.livejournal.com
An update! And so soon! Thank you, thank you, thank you for not keeping us guessing for long! Now do that for the next chapter as well! Please!

Poor Spike, poor little Spike. *tries to comfort Spike* Make it better. Please. You wrote an excellent half insane Dru and delusional Spike, very good, and you didn't kill Wesley *Cheers* But. You. Chipped. Spike! And Xander's no where to be seen. Make it better and soon please. *whimpers* I'm waiting for the next chapter at the edge of my sanity.

thank you

Date: 2007-02-01 09:46 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] stillrose.livejournal.com
...I really don't mean to keep you waiting long on this part. I've already started chap 36.

Yeah..Spike has it rough right now...but I promise..Xander will show up soon and do what he can.

I'm really glad you liked the Dru sequence. I was really afraid to write that..even though my muse insisted. I think meaningful crazy is hard to do...and Dru's "voice" is probably even more difficult then Fred's (for me). Fred's getting easier cuz I'm starting to figure out some really good resources for the "tech" and "sciencey" stuff.

I promise a pinch of comfort in the next chap. :)

sr

Date: 2007-02-01 05:45 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] shakatany.livejournal.com
I almost didn't read this chapter because I was afraid of what was happening to Spike but the Dru bit, with the minimizing of the torture, made it extremely readable.

Yes if Wesley is made a Biogen then there'll be 2 "repaired-human" Biogens out there and the fat will really be in the fire once the news gets out.

That darn cliff *grumbles* More asap.

Shakatany

I'm so glad you did read!

Date: 2007-02-01 09:48 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] stillrose.livejournal.com
...and I'm glad the Dru bit helped. I really debated on that scene but my muse insisted.

As to the Wesley Biogen issue...well I think a few characters are going to have some very strong (and not necessarily the same) opinion about that...stay tuned.

I promise...I won't keep you waiting long. I already started on chap 36. "Xander" and "Spike" are pushing at me. :)

sr

Date: 2007-02-01 06:21 pm (UTC)
ext_63603: king to Mr. Spooky make you feel better? (Default)
From: [identity profile] nomadbeth.livejournal.com
Two things - GAH GET HIM OUTTA THERE!!!!!!

And yea, I hear ya on the Bears vs. Colts.... I live in a Chicago burb, but grew up in Indy. Heh. But I can't admit that to my students, or I'd get tomato'd outta the building!

*smile*

Date: 2007-02-01 09:59 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] stillrose.livejournal.com
...I'm working on chap 36. I promise..Xan will do what he can.

As to the super bowl...LOL! Yeah...at least where I'm at in IN it's not too terrible to be seen in Bears colors...(I'm in Rex Grossman's home town!).

While predominantly everyone here is a Colts fan (cept for the outta state students) most are forgiving for the Bears colors.

sr

Date: 2007-02-01 07:14 pm (UTC)
tabaqui: (spikendrubybittersweet_art)
From: [personal profile] tabaqui
Oh, Dru.
*sniffle*

Of course Wes will be fine. Of course!
*sniffle*

*sniff*

Date: 2007-02-01 10:01 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] stillrose.livejournal.com
I know what you mean.

Almost didn't write the Dru scene.

Love the icon btw. Works for the discussion onthis chapter really well.

sr

Date: 2007-02-01 07:15 pm (UTC)
seleneheart: (falling angel)
From: [personal profile] seleneheart
I love the scene with Dru, her rambling makes so much lovely twisted sense.

*worries about Wes*

thank you!

Date: 2007-02-01 10:03 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] stillrose.livejournal.com
...I really worried about writing for Dru. For me, Fred's "voice" is usually the hardest to do...but Dru's had me constantly second guessing myself.

I'm already working on chap 36. I promise I won't make y'all wait too long.

sr

Date: 2007-02-01 08:52 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] lil-miss-maddie.livejournal.com
No no no no nononononnoNOOOOOO! *cries*

Not a chip! God I hate thse fucking Council arseholes!
Can't somebody put a chip in their heads. let them know what it feels like to have your face kicked, but not be able to fight back.

The Dru part was absolutely lovely! I love the way she calls Xander kitten. I think it really suits him.

It was interesting to read from somebody else's point of view. I feel so sorry for Faith.
Only have to ask one thing. Wes an fred are together, right? I don't think I got that wrong... It was just that this sentence confused me
but she’d just had her hands inside a man she knew loved her and she needed a moment to compose herself. because she mentions how she knows Wes loves her, but nothing about how the man she loves might die. I just found the phrasing strange, did you have a special purpose for it?

You're doing a wonderful job as usual.

I am a complete confrontation addict, and proud of it! So I can't wait for hell to break loose (which I hope it does) when Xander meets his "old" family. Just make sure Xander and Spike are happy and together in the end :)
Curious about your Giles. He has to be a bit different, I'm thinking, since he ought to have been aware of the whole Biogen history. Although, come to think of it, in BtVS he never really explained how the whole "demon = bad" concept is a bit more tricky than that.
I want a big scene where Xander tells everyone he's a happy Biogen (almost) and in love with William the Bloody!

One correction:
Fred sat down next to Fred
The second "Fred" should be "Faith", since fred comes in to tell them how Wesley is doing.

I want more! It's getting so exciting!

Hugs!

thank you!

Date: 2007-02-01 10:25 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] stillrose.livejournal.com
First..off..a heartfelt thanks for catching the typo! I appreciate that. :)

Ok...as to Fred and Wes....I've been sticking with "cannon" mostly where Wesley has unrequited love for Fred. It's not a secret...even from her..even though everyone thinks it is..a secret from her..that is. :)

Giles...well there will be a confrontation between Xander and Giles about what the G-man knows. How could there not? Xander...has questions....I'll let the story say whether or not Giles has answers?

Yep..the council pri..er..soldiers are being...well...Council soldiers. Don't worry...next chap Xander will do what he can. :)

Glad you liked the Dru sequence. Was really worried about that one.

Don't worry..next chap will be out very soon. I've already started to work on it.

sr

Date: 2007-02-01 09:27 pm (UTC)
ext_33210: (Default)
From: [identity profile] mistress-tien.livejournal.com
I don't think I can read anymore for awhile. The suspense is going to kill me! I'm not cut out for WIPs. I get twitchy. I worry. I fret.

I'm going to have to wait for 3-4 chapters so there's some chance they boys will be back together.

Oh, my poor nerves!

Keep up the good work!!! Thanks for a riveting chapter!

eeek! i'm losing you?

Date: 2007-02-01 10:32 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] stillrose.livejournal.com
...ok..I understand..me bad author...too many cliffs..but I promise I'm writing as quickly as I can. :) Already started chap 36. I promise..in the next chap..Xander will do what he can.

Drink some chamomile tea (little honey in it if your throat is scratchy)...and relax...I promise chap 36 will be out soon.

:) Though..I understand the concept of waiting until chaps build up. I'm being absolutely tortured waiting for wtf_is_shame's next chapter and there's this mcshep..WIP which is constantly causing me to check Wraithbait for an update!

So...I can't fault you! :)

Glad you still love the story..and it's keeping you interested!

sr

Re: eeek! i'm losing you?

Date: 2007-02-01 11:56 pm (UTC)
ext_33210: (Default)
From: [identity profile] mistress-tien.livejournal.com
I'm not gone, I'm just . . . waiting.

It could be the stress of the programming I'm doing, too. I need some good boy loving ;-). I really love your Spike and Xander. Maybe I'll just re-read this story. Go back to the "early days".

Don't rush anything. I love good stories and I'm willing to wait. I'm just impatient right now. That's my problem, not yours.

As I've said before, I will be nominating you for best AU somewhere, sometime. I'm not an AU fan, but this story is excellent.

Re: eeek! i'm losing you?

Date: 2007-02-02 06:51 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] stillrose.livejournal.com
Ewwwww....programming "sucks"...IMHO.... having to learn how to do sql queries is bad enough (which I have to do more of my analysis work)

As to rereading the story...I'm looking forward to that when I finish this. I want to read what I wrote from beginning to end. Have thought I might tweak a few things based on subsequent research I've done (that's actually surprised me..how much research I have done as I'm writing this story..not on just the show..but British slang...and some other things).

Thank you for the nomination support. *blush* That means a lot. Did more work on chap 36 last night. This is going to be a long chapter. :)

sr

Date: 2007-02-02 12:59 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] hippychc.livejournal.com
*Hugs Dru* No matter what Xan does, Spike knows that Xander won't abandon him. Can we lock certain council members and Caleb in a room together ....just for kicks....pleeeease?

thank you

Date: 2007-02-02 06:53 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] stillrose.livejournal.com
...Yeah...Dru was a comfort..and Spike still loves his pet. :)

Well...maybe Caleb and the evil council folks will be in the same karmic waiting room as they wait to get back on the wheel of fate... :)

Been working on chap 36. With any luck I'll get it out sometime this weekend. :)

sr

Date: 2007-02-02 01:51 am (UTC)
ext_30096: (Default)
From: [identity profile] yanagi-wa.livejournal.com
Ouch! Poor Spike. *pokes Xander* Go rescue Spike! Now! Where is the boy? Great work. Thank you.

you're welcome

Date: 2007-02-02 07:01 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] stillrose.livejournal.com
....don't worry...Xander hasn't forgotten Spike. I promise Xander is going to do what he can. Already started chap 36.

sr

Date: 2007-02-02 02:28 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] http://users.livejournal.com/_sharvie_/
Ack! My poor Spike. I was worried more of his convo had been overheard. And the chip! I totally forgot about the chip. Eeep! Xander has to rescue him soon! *cries*

Love this line: He rolls over and purrs sweetly but his claws are sharp! I have such a kink for Xander being a sub but not being a sub.

Loving it!

*smile*

Date: 2007-02-02 07:02 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] stillrose.livejournal.com
Yeah..bloody evil prats them Council soldiers are...bloody stupid chip!

Don't worry..Xander hasn't forgotten Spike. Already working on chap 36.

And...yeah....I share your kink... sub-but-not-sub Xander. :)

sr

Date: 2007-02-02 03:41 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] altyronsmaker.livejournal.com
*cries*

meep! make it better? soon?

Poor Spike AND Xander. *sniff*

ok...

Date: 2007-02-02 07:03 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] stillrose.livejournal.com
...Don't worry...Xander hasn't forgotten Spike. Already started chap 36.

Hang in there.

btw -love the icon. :)

sr

Date: 2007-02-02 06:17 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] sparrow2000.livejournal.com
Wail, make it better. Wesley's hurt and Spike's hurt and Xander has to pretend he hates his honey.
Name your price and I'll pay it - just make it better.

Seriously, that was just great angst love. The stuff with Dru was especially good.
And I love that Spike is still worrying about his looks in the middle of getting a serious kicking.

Can't wait to see what happens next!

chocolate chip cookie dough

Date: 2007-02-02 07:07 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] stillrose.livejournal.com
..yep...won't settle for nuttin' less! *evil grin*

But don't worry...I have some in the fridge and I've already started chap 36. Don't worry...Xander hasn't forgotten his Spike.

I'm glad you liked the Dru stuff. Was really nervous about that sequence.

I love that final line too. Felt the scene needed a little levity..and it is SOOOOO Spike.

Chap 36 coming soon...promise...

sr

Date: 2007-02-02 09:30 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] andartha.livejournal.com
First off, I feel that pulling in Dru to smooth things a bit around the very sharp and pointy edges of this story twist was bloody ingenious. In a lot of cultures all over the world people pray to their ancestors to protect and quide the living possible. In todays world, "family" becomes more and more a thing of choice rather than birth. Having Dru appear illustrates how strong the bond between her and Will was, how deep their love, despite the pain and the terror they lived in. Having her, who suffered in life so much that it broke her, come back to speak on the behalf of love and trust is a beacon of hope and it warmed me down to my toes.

Concerning what the council boys are doing to Spike, the wrongness of it makes me flinch, but I can also understand why they're acting like that.

#1 They've been brought up to believe that their hatred and anger is justified. For some of them it might acutally be more than that. Just like Xander one or two of them are bound to have lost loved ones, family and friends to biogen attacks. It's hard to stick to something approximating the Geneva Conventions when every fibre in your body is screaming at you that you're dealing with something that's a threat to your "tribe".

#2 Despite Spike being chipped again, they're probably still scared shitless of him. Fear is an irrational, mindless thing, William the Bloody did a lot in the past to deserve that name and a chip seems like such a flimsy defense when you think about it. So if you're afraid of someone, you beat them up if you can, just to proove to yourself (and to your peers) that no, you're not scared _at all_...

*growls* Mind you, not forgiving them despite the fact that I understand.

As for the Crew of the DeSoto, my heart bleeds for them and I admire the courage and strenght that got them out of this fix, despite their hearts getting torn in the process.

Spike and Xander....they're in for a rough ride. They'll hurt and bleed and not only where it shows. Still my trust into the two of them is great....they're strong. They'll make it.

Thank you once more for giving us this wonderful story ^_^

and...thank you...

Date: 2007-02-04 05:01 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] stillrose.livejournal.com
For such wonderful feedback! Again I'm very happy the Dru sequence worked...and I liked how you brought the ancestor's inerpretation into it. That was nice.

And yes....there are people that would lash out for the reasons you outlined...and then there are people who'll do that just because they are sadists.

The crew of the DeSoto have been through a lot..but they are a strong bunch.

Spike and Xander..that's going to be tough...but I am a Spander gal. :)

I'm about half way through chap 36! I'm going to work on it some more tomorrow before the Superbowl. ;)

sr

Date: 2007-02-04 07:54 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] maisonenflambe.livejournal.com
I'm so lucky! I just stumbled across your site and got to read all 35 chaps at once, lol. I'm totally enjoying this story.

And poor Spike! Great Spike/Dru bit; love the forshadowing here. You can just tell that Xan's gonna be a bastard and Spike's gonna get hurt and those poor boys won't know who loves who anymore. Wah!

Seriously good stuff.

Thank you!

Date: 2007-02-05 02:46 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] stillrose.livejournal.com
Glad you found and enjoyed the story!!! I'm really glad the Dru bit worked. I was worried about trying to do her.

Anyway..just posted chap 36! :)

sr

Date: 2007-02-04 04:06 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] thismaz.livejournal.com
O-oh. This is bad. The DeSoto has to leave, to save Wes, but they are leaving Spike and Xander in such a bad place. And Spike has a new chip. *cries*
Loved Dru, like all your characters, so true to cannon, in such different circumstances.
I am worried about how Xander will cope, hiding his new nature and worrying about Spike.
But I'm looking forward to seeing Buffy and Willow in this universe.
Wonderful, as always.

Thank you!

Date: 2007-02-05 02:47 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] stillrose.livejournal.com
Yep..the boys are in a bad spot...and Xander is gambling everything on his friendship with the girls...but he has to make it back to the 'Dale first before he can even hope for their help.

Just posted chap 36.

sr

Date: 2007-02-05 01:21 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] pretty-vampire.livejournal.com
Oh..poor Spike!!! Hope Xander can help him soon and both of them are safe.

My favorite story!!! (^_^)

*blush* Thank you

Date: 2007-02-05 02:48 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] stillrose.livejournal.com
...glad you are enjoying! Yep...Xander and Spike are in a really bad spot.

Just posted chap 36.

sr

Date: 2007-02-05 08:59 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] stretfordditto.livejournal.com
OMg I can't take the angst! :( Excellent chapter.

One of the things I really Love about this fic

Date: 2008-01-09 05:49 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] zazreil.livejournal.com
Is the use of Jesse and Dru in the sub conscious imagery. You do it so well that the reader is not really sure if its a ghost or the mind of the unconscious person trying to deal and understand what he senses is going on around him or needs to believe.

very well constructed

Zaz
From: [identity profile] stillrose.livejournal.com
THANK YOU! That was *exactly* the affect I was trying for when I was writing those scenes! ")

I wanted the reader to decide for themselves. :)

sr

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